about us: a note from Paula

Ten years ago, I turned forty. I had never considered age before, but suddenly I realized a lot of people had lots of opinions about it. Suddenly I was the subject of those horrid “top ten” lists — apparently there are lots and lots of rules about appropriate hair styles, dress styles and savings plans for the forty plus women.

I felt exactly like I did at 39 and I soon started a Facebook page under the handle “lovingpink@40.” Now I need a new handle called “lovingpink@50.” I wrote about things that mattered to me, whether it was my confusion about what “aging gracefully” really meant, the effect of seeing so many perfect “Facebook lives,” the lessons I wish I could give my nieces (even though I would have ignored me at that age) or the horrible “mature” moniker attached to women over forty. Soon I discovered that lots of other women had opinions about these topics too and I loved the stories I would read in the comments — sometimes hilarious and sometimes heartbreaking.

I was working on developing a skincare brand at the same time, so I spent an enormous amount of time reading about women over forty. I discovered we are as diverse as any other group but we are not how we are often portrayed — pining for the beauty of our younger years, unhappy with the responsibilities that our lives include. Instead, I discovered that women grow more confident as they get older and in fact we have all sorts of dreams and aspirations ahead of us. I learned that marketers ignore us but we control more purchasing power than any other group in the United States. And lots of other stuff.

I also learned that women appreciated a forum to discuss our lives and how our relationship to ourselves has changed over time. We are in many, many ways — in the words of one woman responding to a post, “at [our] peak.” We are “queenagers” and we are “at the pinnacle” of our lives. I also learned that, unsurprisingly, we experience all sorts of scary challenges — some of the responses to my post about spousal abuse as well as a post about the heartbreaks of caring for an ill parent both astounded me for their bravery and also broke my heart a little.

serenewhimsy is in part a continuation of the conversation we started ten years ago. But it is much more than that. One stereotype is more or less true — we are all incredibly busy with living life. We have the opportunities in the workplace that we fought so hard for but we continue to be the primary caretaker of children and parents alike. I have spent a lot of time considering where it is that brands fail us. My conclusion is that brands don’t pay enough attention to what we truly want and need. And while nothing is quite this simple, I concluded that we all need time. To fulfill our obligations, yes, but also to pursue the many opportunities that we dream of. We are not winding down our life. In virtually every way, we are just beginning our best life. The life that is defined by our dreams and desires.

and thus the launch of serenewhimsy. an online presence created to offer you time. to make you ready for the myriad of special moments ahead. Ready for date night despite the long night at work. Ready for talking to your daughter about the importance of resilience and self-reliance. I know that sounds like a rather vague goal, but I promise that there are very concrete goals behind the lofty principles.

serenewhimsy is very much a work in progress and i hope it grows with the input of each of you. The question will always be: “what do you want and need that isn’t available to you today?” More fundamentally, “what will help you to live your best life yet?” Nothing is perfect from the start, so expect the twists and turns of any project that will (i hope) include wonderful successes and (i know) will include some terrible mistakes as well.

thank you, thank you, thank you for your interest in serenewhimsy. it means the world to me. i hope very much that you will keep on sharing your stories with me and all the others who are part of this community.

Please always feel free to reach out to me directly at paula@myserenewhimsy.com. And if you have a story or project to share with the world, let’s discuss.

Have a wonderful day.

Best,

Paula